Sunday, January 11, 2009

Adventure Prone

There are those they say I am injury prone. There are many of my friends (and now even blog associates) who carry injuries from their very active lifestyles. Just today, Dirk has spider related toe injuries, Dr Nick has a busted knee (forgot his kneepads, bang, oospies, ow), snowangel has a torn achillies from generally working out more than any ten people. I have a minor ligament tear in my finger and Achilles tendonitis from cricket.

That is just todays list. If we go into history, I can report over 100 breakages, with each of my fingers coping at least one each, and my poor nose getting busted in excess of 15 times. Nick has spectacular motorcycle and mountain bike accidents. I play dangerous sports, and love them. When I look around to most of my friends, they are all cool, calm guys and girls that like doing really dangerous stuff. My long term female non-girlfriend friends all have one thing in common - they've all patched me up, from sewing my foot back together to helping me set broken fingers.

My best stack: One of the most under-rated sports in terms of danger is volleyball. Not the sun and sand version, I mean hard court volleyball. One, you have a hard, smooth floor. When you come down, that wood does not give. Unless you plant cleanly, you will slip and slide. And if you go up, you have to come down.

I was playing for the Dragons in Maryborough. I went up for the spike, and nailed it. I came down, and landed with my foot flat on the ground. Another defender came down, perfectly legally, however right on top of my foot. I fell over, and my knee was touching the ground. While my foot was still flat on the floor, pressed down by the other guys foot.

The close tendons went through compression, the far ones went from stretch. I was instantly in shock, which was handy, as it was a complete mess. I instantly called for two people to carry me off. When I am in dealing with a critical stuation, such as injury, sports, or shock, I get very 'general' and order people around. I ordered two people to carry me in a cradle. I was being carried towards the spectators, which happened to include a visiting Californian girls representative team. At this point, the ankle realised that it was not actually being held in place by anything other than a skin bag, and lolled (old school lolled, my foot did not laugh out loud) most dramatically. Dramatically enough that pretty much anyone who was watching screamed in horror.

With that little bugger of an injury I spent three months off my feet entirely, and then three months on crutches. Even at that rate, I was off the crutches to early, and my limping caused my left leg to lengthen.

Where do you come in on the scale of danger? Is this whole scene alien to you? Are you one of those that busts their body looking for the thrills that can only be found near the edge, or do you walk the calmer path? Give me a rundown - best mangles, and do you wham yourself regularly?

13 comments:

Flinthart said...

Birmo writes of his fictional Dirk Flinthart that somehow, Flinthart is always far away from the damaging centre of the chaos storms that arise from his behaviour.

The little toe on my left foot, possibly (okay, probably) broken the other day, is my second break in a life of... peculiar stuff. The first was the little toe on my right foot. I dropped one of the old-style thick glass litre bottles of coke on in when I was about thirteen... the full bottle came down, mouth/neck first, right onto the poor toe. Snap. Crackle. Fuck!

Despite years in martial arts and all kinds of silliness (playing volleyball? Why yes. On a cobbled back yard. Over a camouflage net. While drunk as a fuckwit, and correspondingly stoned. Daily for at least a year. Although the drugs varied.)

Fortunately, I've never cared much for competitive sports. (Losing sucks. And people hate you when you win. What's the point?) But also, I've been lucky, careful, and observant.

Here's hoping I can keep it up.

Anonymous said...

Exercise is bad for you, Bart.

I did once try bungee jumping. My eyes were bloodshot a week later...everyone thought I was stoned.

Anyway, beers on Thursday would be good...have u been to Zierholz yet?

Ysambart said...

I think I have drunk a Zierholz at debacle, but if it's a place you recommend, I think we should go...

Anonymous said...

I haven't been there, so I can't vouch...suspect it doesn't get much walk-in traffic though. The atmos in Fyshwick might be a little on the dodge side... any other preferences?

Guru Bob said...

My motto has always been 'the bigger they are, the harder they fall' so I try not to fall, or at least minimise the opportunities to damage myself. Have had some bad knee injuries - broke one and sprained the other at Sunnyboys gig once and they have never been quite the same since. I know if I was fitter it probably wouldn't be such an issue.

Guru Bob said...

It doesn't help being a clumsy oaf sometimes either.

Ysambart said...

Ahh, I love competitive sports, and am a complete adrenaline junkie. It's very little about winning and losing unless you have a hole in your soul. It's about the perfect moments of action, looking into the eyes of a team mate and being able to anticipate the action, and the complete gamble. Dice are uninteresting, horses are rigged, lotto is too clinical - like any Australian, I love to gamble, and I love putting my efforts on the line to change the result, and to fight the fight and turn the odds. I'm pretty sure the wargaming and 40k etc is about the same thing with fantasy/ epic scale stuff added in.

Ysambart said...

Also Flinty - two breaks in your lifetime! With all the stuff you do is... remarkable indeed.

Abe - give me the street address and the time, and I'll be there. Atmosphere doesn't worry me. I'm from Logan back in the day, so I've been in worse. My shifts are finishing at 6, and I'll drive straight there from Belco.

GB - my worst gig related injury was an accidental boot to the head from a crowd surfer wearing docs. The collective we grabbed him and threw him into the security pit for his thoughtlessness. He hoped back up on top so someone liberated his shoes and threw them into the crowd. He didn't get back up that gig. Festival Hall, Jane's Addiction last gig, if I recall.

NowhereBob said...

I have dislocated both knees & both ankles (thankyou hockey.)
Had my nose broken twice (Once @ school in a blue once by my mate playing basketball.)Taken about 3 square meters of skin off with bikes, both motor & push. Bashed crashed and generally mangled myself in a series of incidents, however my best stacks - at least the most specky ones with an audience always seem to end up injury free. The most recent one included my wife's pushbike, an audience of about 20, an indiscreet amount of booze and a really deep culvet that looked just like a shadow on the nicely mown lawn. Again, I came out of it completely unscathed - a daylight reconoitre showed massive jagged rocks that my melon must have missed by inches. I had to buy her a new bike as the front forks were bent back to a point where you could only go right - not straight, not left, just degrees of right.
I used climb - mountains, buildings & really big trees and have never seriously injured myself that way. I did learn that freeballing (AKA going commando) and climbing harnesses are NOT a good combination. Pinchy pinchy!

Anonymous said...

Ok It's at 19-25 Kembla St...

here's a link.

http://www.outincanberra.com.au/zierholzpremiumbrewery/menus

How's 6.30 to 7pm Thurs?

Ysambart said...

I will head there straight from work - should be about right.

Ysambart said...

Nowhere Bob - duly noted. Always wear gruts when wearing harness.

Ysambart said...

Three hours until CNB brewed yummy beer - And Dr Nick is in on the adventure. The 6pm shift person is not present, so I am covering until then - so I will be leaving Belco at around 6.10 and getting there bang on time. Due to firewalls I will be emailing this comment to the good doctor.